During my first weekend in college, I wanted to attend the freshmen fair my university was hosting on campus. However, my roommates and suitemates wanted to watch the Video Music Awards instead. Usually, I would’ve wanted to do the same, but this was college, and I wanted–no, I needed this phase of my life to be fun. I’d decided the summer before that I no longer wanted to wait on others to enjoy life. So, despite the fear in my introverted heart, I went to the fair alone, and that night, I met my best friend!
That was the first time I ventured off alone, and now, over a decade later, solo dates are a regular part of my self care routine. From trying new restaurants to working on my personal goals, it’s dedicated time that I set aside to do anything I want! While it’s something that’s become somewhat natural for me, I realize that many people struggle to do so, so here’s my guide to solo dating!
RECOGNIZE THE BENEFITS
If you’re feeling afraid to venture out alone or too busy to make time for yourself, recognizing the benefits of solo dates may help you work through those challenges. Do you need some time away from your family to recharge? Experiencing a creative block? Are you bored or lonely? Depending on where you decide to go for your solo outing, here are some of the benefits you may enjoy:
- New experiences and people
- Creative inspiration
- Quiet/time to think
- Learning something new about yourself
- Increased productivity
- Improved confidence, dopamine, and/or serotonin levels
MAKE A PLAN AND MAKE IT FUN
Try centering your solo dating journey around a personal goal. Whether you want to network more, be more active, or try new foods, make the time fulfilling and joyous.
Schedule your dates with yourself, and decide what you’ll do ahead of time as you get into the swing of things.
Here are some solo date ideas:
- Book a massage at Even Keel Wellness Spa
- Visit Illusions Restaurant & Bar, The Lodge, Federal House, or Rams Head on Stage for live music or
karaoke - Attend a free event at an Anne Arundel County Public Library branch
- Visit a local park to walk and audio journal
- Eat something new during Food Truck Friday at the Anne Arundel Farmers Market Pavilion
- Work from a local coffee shop like Rise Up in Annapolis
- See a movie on Discount Tuesday/Wednesday at AMC Annapolis Mall 11
- Check out the latest performance at the Ballet Theatre of Maryland* or an art exhibition at Maryland Hall’s galleries
- Take your dog for a stroll in downtown Annapolis
- Get a day pass for Lifetime Gym in Annapolis, or the YMCA in Arnold or Pasadena
You’ll be surprised at how fun and opportunities can find you right where you are. There have been times when I’ve gone out solo and run into someone I know. As long as you feel safe, I say go for it!
PRIORITIZE IT
Once you make a plan, stick to it! The biggest thing that helped me do this was realizing that this is time dedicated to showing up for me. Besides, if you genuinely make space for fun, you’ll want to stick to your plan. Block the time off in your calendar, schedule a babysitter, and take some PTO if needed.
This isn’t just about having a good time; it’s about making time to recharge and being comfortable in
your skin, no matter what room you’re in. It’s okay to scroll on your phone between bites at the bar
or to call a friend during your walk in the park, but also make time to be present in the moment and take in your surroundings.
My motto: Don’t overcomplicate it, but be intentional! Everything else will happen naturally.
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